A Word on Check-Ins

Happy April, readers! I’m going to start today with a fun story about one of Katie’s Facebook posts.

We all know the internet is a beautiful, though stupid and very dangerous place. I was pretty disappointed to read a piece in my daily newsletter from NPR on April 1 that indicated my favorite news source no longer participated in April Fools headlines. This decision was largely because we have to verify every news headline that comes into our inbox due to an influx of fake news on a daily basis already – almost like every day is April Fools Day.

And while I’m a huge fan of satire and the occasional prank, the truth is that the population is growing increasingly more gullible. It’s also pretty wild how everyone seems to know that cable television news like CNN and Fox are sensationalist at best and are, therefore, not reputable, yet people continue to stay glued to them in the name of “staying informed.” People will believe anything if it aligns with the narrative they’ve already chosen to believe.

This was the case when one of her acquaintances decided to use Katie’s post about being inspired by the great Martha Stewart as a platform from which she could spread false claims of A-list celebrities supplementing with aborted baby stem cells. When prompted for a source for her information, the person resorted to the classic, “a simple Google will help you.” Spoiler, I did a “simple Google” and came up with a decent number of hits about this supposed practice – none of them, however, could verify their sources and were therefore, disreputable.

The key takeaway from this story is to always check your references. No matter your stance on any hot-button issue (in this case, abortion), be aware of your biases when reading news stories and for the love of every single one of the old Norse gods, verify your sources. NPR.org = good, JoesCatholicHeadlines.net = bad.

With that said.

Things are going to be changing here at Beard Hair in My Coffee. As many of you know, this blog has taken on many different themes, styles, purposes and even names over the last 15 years or so, therefore it shouldn’t be much of a surprise to find out it’s about to happen again. I think it was about two years ago when I decided to start utilizing my blog space here to announce and track my goals each month, thinking it was going to somehow help me stay accountable. I figured it was also a great way to be able to look back and reference old accomplished (or failed) goals from the past.

But those who know me also know that I am a firm believer in science – and I’m not afraid of having my mind changed. Recently, I’ve been studying some information that indicates that my idea of sharing my monthly goals with my readers as a means of staying accountable may have actually been hindering me in the long run. There are a number of reasons for this, and just so none of you think I’m some kind of fake-news Facebook-rando blowhard, I have verifiable references I can cite:

This particular study by Peter M. Gollwitzer, Paschal Sheeran, Verena Michalski and Andrea E. Seifert in the peer-reviewed journal Psychological Science found that people are less likely to put forth the necessary effort to reach a goal if A) the goal is identity-related and B) the person received social recognition.
This study by Kyla Haimovitz and Jennifer Henderlong Corpus in the peer-reviewed Journal of Educational Psychology found that personal praise – which you’re often given once you announce a grandiose goal – isn’t helpful, and can even lead to greater disappointment upon goal failure.
Next, this study by Ayelet Fishbach, Tal Eyal and Stacey R. Finkelstein in Social and Personality Psychology Compass suggests that beginners respond positively to positive feedback, but folks who are more advanced respond better to negative feedback. This leads us to theorize that the positive feedback we’d receive when we announce the goal is great when we’re getting going, but isn’t helpful at all if it’s something we’ve been working on and need help figuring out what we’re doing wrong.
Finally, this study by G. Oettingen and D. Mayer in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that sharing your goals and receiving a positive reaction from your friends, family or even blog readers can put you in what’s called a “positive fantasy” that releases the same amount of dopamine (pleasure) in the brain as if you had actually accomplished the goal already! This leads us to put less effort into actually achieving the goal, because why would we if our brains and bodies feel like we have already?

With this in mind, I have decided to stop sharing my goals on this blog. Will I share accomplishments as they happen? Hell yes, I will. Will I also be sharing some of the fun, interesting things I’ve gotten myself into over the last few weeks? You betcha. But for now, I’m leaving the goals right where they belong – in my notebook, in my heart, and in the forefront of my mind. I have some really cool things I’m hoping to accomplish in the next few weeks, months and years … and neither of them involve living in a “positive fantasy.”

I certainly hope you don’t mind.

Rad Things From March:

The first super-cool thing I want to share from March is what I learned while researching my family tree. For years, I avoided doing such a thing, largely because I was afraid it was going to be disappointing. I’ve carried the Viking motif for the last decade and found spiritual solace, strength and confidence in it, yet when people asked me if I chose that path because I had Scandinavian lineage, I had to be honest and say I don’t know. I always knew the Simpson name was Scottish but that’s as far as I’d gotten. I had created a hopeful (though fictitious) scenario where a tall, crazy strong female Viking pulled her boat ashore on the coast of Scotland where she made a meek, though very intelligent, potato farmer her man-bitch. His name was Simpson and the rest would be history.

Turns out, that wasn’t what happened, exactly, but I only know this because I finally bit the bullet. With the help of some online resources, I traced my heritage back to 1st Century Scandinavia! As it turns out, my mother’s father’s father’s line goes back to 1st Century Norway, but it’s my Father’s Father’s Mother’s family that is the most interesting. I was able to trace this lineage back about 40 generations, from East Tennessee to Virginia, then to England, Scotland and France … then 1st-Century Denmark.

It appears I am a descendent of Viking warrior Sigurd “Snake-in-the-Eye,” one of the famed “Sons of Ragnar!” It’s historically accepted (mostly) that his father was the legendary Ragnar Lothbrok and his mother was the beautiful Aslaug. After Ragnar’s death at the hands of King Ælla of Northumbria, his sons Sigurd, Ivar “The Boneless,” Ubba, Halfdan, Hvitserk and Bjorn Ironside joined the Great Heathen Army with intentions of avenging their father’s death. They were ultimately successful, reportedly killing King Ælla with the notorious Blood Eagle, but it seems Sigurd got more out of the bargain as he appears to have married Blaeja, the king’s daughter. And this is in my family tree.

Sigurd, my dude. Kill the king, then marry his daughter? THAT is how you Viking!

In other news, this month was the month of Pitmaster Firefly as I threw down on some Smoked Al Pastor, Smoked Chicken Shawarma and Smoked Gyro with my new vertical spit. I wrote a banjo song called “I’ve Had Enough” inspired by Joe Biden’s shitty State of the Union Address and the Republicans’ even shittier response. I came across what I think was an attempt at raising the dead at my boxing spot at Lakeshore Park. We celebrated Katie’s grandaddy’s 90th birthday with an at-home party, Katie was featured in City View Magazine (again – she’s amazing!), my blood pressure hit an all-time low, my weight is still going down and I enjoyed a fun tie-dye cake with some friends. I bought my first set of casting Runes, smoked some pork chops for Ostara family dinner and wrapped things up by letting Katie put flowers in my beard.