The Vegan – Gay Monkey

A Poem…

Sometimes I eat grass
but today I’m eating a stick
If I ate a dead animal
It would surely make me sick
I’m jealous of the other monkeys
Ones that eat whatever they want
But I’ll just keep eating leaves
I enjoy them – Wait, no I don’t
Maybe some hay, straw or wheat
would improve my terrible diet
My carnivorous friends drink lots of blood
and when they do I sit in the corner – quiet
For I am the vegetarian monkey
watching everything I eat
eating twigs with my hands
holding vines with my feet
The girls swoon at my six pack
Young and old all look my way
They think I’m cool and unaffected
But I’m really also gay
Not much calling for a vegan, gay monkey
But there’s no reason to hide
For someone in the jungle needs to represent
That vegan, gay monkey pride!


  1. Nothing against gay vegan monkeys…but he doesn’t sound like he is really happy..he needs a friend, gay or otherwise. I liked the poem. :)


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