Blessed Samhain, readers!

This year I’m asking the ancestors for one simple thing: hope. This era of my life has been very frustrating and confusing. As the candles burn this year, I’ll be looking for signs of confidence during my health journey, as I figure out friendships and as I learn who I am. Or what I am. Or why I am.

Each year we celebrate the Equinox and then the evening of the thinnest veil, I remember all the lessons my Paps taught me. I wish with every ounce of my soul that he was still here to teach me more. There are so many things I didn’t pay attention to growing up and when he wasn’t around, I didn’t always feel safe seeking answers on my own. I’ve grown to be a man who values living a life left of center, outside of the box and counter to the norm, yet I’m often reminded that having a soul like this can make for a lonely existence.

I could be surrounded by hoards of companions if I simply went for status quo and strove to fit in with the masses, but such a life is banal and uninteresting to me. Paps seemed to understand me; As the veil pulls back, I’ll be looking for his understanding once again. Maybe then I can understand where the hell I’m supposed to be going. Until then …

Goals I’ve Kept Up With:

Clean Eating & Tithemi

Halloween party aside, I’ve been doing really well with my workouts and nutrition. I recently wrapped up Phase 1 of the Tithemi program and am currently in the middle of Phase 2, Week 2/6. At the conclusion of Phase 1, I had lost 11 pounds, 1” in my waist, .75” in my neck and 1% body fat. Phase 2’s workouts follow the classic Arnold Split with chest/back days on Mondays and Thursdays, arms/shoulders days on Tuesdays and Fridays, then legs days on Wednesdays and Saturdays. I’m pairing this with stationary bike HIIT workouts on Mondays and Thursdays, treadmill HIIT on Tuesdays and Fridays, then elliptical HIIT on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Nutritionally I’m still sticking with a DASH-inspired eating philosophy, focusing primarily on reducing sodium and saturated fat intake. It’s going to be difficult with so many holidays, anniversaries, birthdays and other celebrations between now and the end of the year but it’s not easy any other time of the year either. Let’s get shredded either way!

220 Pounds by 39

Still killing it here. As I said above, I’m down 11 pounds, averaging out around 224 most mornings. I have about six weeks before I turn 39 so we’ll see what happens!

Plan Two More Dinner Parties

Katie and I planned, designed, thought out, shopped for, decorated and absolutely stressed out over our Halloween party this year. Our efforts didn’t go unnoticed, however, as we hosted a house full of great friends who positively chowed down on our bomb-ass food and laughed with us until the wee hours of the morning. One down, one to go!

Saturday Night Grindhouse Project

Moving right along! My foreword has been submitted, my introduction has been written and my editor has made it through Chapter 6! At this rate, I’ll have something published in the spring? Maybe? I don’t know how this works.

3-Month Goal – Read 3 New Books (15 Books: 12 Month Goal)

I did poorly last month, dragging my ass through that book, but I did finally finish Punk Rock Blitzkrieg: My Life as a Ramone by Marky Ramone. It maybe took me longer than I would have liked to finish but it wasn’t because it was boring – it was a GREAT book! Five stars, easily. That brings my yearly book number up to 13. In the spirit of the season, I am now reading The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty. 

Folk-Punk

I wouldn’t say I’m a songwriting tour-de-force but I have for sure been working on this goal. I wrote one full song this past month called “Strong” and have performed it for an audience a single time. I’ve started on a couple of others but they’re currently just concepts. I’m having a great time just getting more and more acquainted with the sub-genre.

Goals that Need Revision:

Dreams

I don’t think this needs to be revisited as much as it just needs to happen. I set this goal earlier in the year – to be more concrete with my life dreams and when I feel like I don’t have them, go about making them. 

New Goals:

None this month.

Goals I’m Letting Go:

None this month.

Rad Things From October:

Katie and I celebrated three years together by having cocktails at Lonesome Dove and Brother Werewolf then dinner at Osteria Stella (our favorite spot!). We saw my friend Grace get married and bought three skellies that turned into a fortune teller, a bathing lady and a rude parking attendant. I hit 11 pounds lost and started the next phase of my workout program, which is currently wearing my ass out. I was judged harshly by the drive-thru worker at Krispy Kreme, wrote a blog post about my favorite album of all time and celebrated three years with Brüe. I ate a rad Torta Cubana from a local Mexican joint and officially retired my personal trainer social media accounts*. I have also deactivated my Facebook account (again)**.

*I plan to post something more in-depth about my decision to stop posting on my fitness accounts and retire from making content. I’m in a weirdly low and dark place, friends, but in this low and dark place I’m finding myself to be philosophically fertile. I just hope I can put some creativity or productivity behind it.

**Facebook has been stressing me out and depressing me more than ever lately. I don’t use, and never have used, the platform for networking, my posts generally receive minimal interaction (likely due to me having a very small friends list, a result of me not using it as a networking tool) and the content just generally brings me down. Palestine and Israel are going at it and “sophisticated” Americans are taking it as an excuse to post either Islamophobic or antisemitic (sometimes both) shit. The fat-ass Cheeto and disgraced former president is facing 34 felony counts in New York, 40 felony counts in Florida, four felony counts in Washington, DC and 13 felony counts in Georgia, yet his ride-or-die fanbase takes to social to proclaim his innocence, saying their pumpkin god racking up 91 charges with very little legal ground to stand on is somehow a democrat conspiracy. And seemingly every other day more and more Americans are senselessly murdered by mentally disturbed people armed with weaponry no civilian should ever have access to, yet most conservatives still take to their socials to grasp their firearms like metal erections and only offer up helpless thoughts and hopeless prayers. I’m sick of it. I can stay well informed of the daily news without staying glued to a cable news channel and mindlessly scrolling on Facebook. And don’t tell me I’m sticking my head in the sand because I will put you in your place.

We’ll see what November has to say about it all. Until then, ever onward.

-JS