Back when I drafted my annual birthday post, I outlined all the cool new (to me) stuff that I knocked out on the smoker this year. When I defined that array of items, I was pretty well convinced that I wouldn’t be covering any new ground between then and the end of the year, but boy was I wrong!

Before I dive into the two newest additions, I want to give a shoutout to Susie Bulloch of Hey Grill Hey because she has served as my sherpa on this mountain of barbecue. My boy Meathead Goldwyn wrote my bible and taught me the science, of course (Meathead: The Science of Great Barbecue and Grilling), but Susie’s barbecue expertise has helped me apply that knowledge in a way that makes me look like a pitmaster superhero at home. Both recipes listed below come from Hey Grill Hey.

A few weeks ago, Katie announced that she would like to have some friends over for dinner and a game night. I was hyped about the idea until I asked her when she wanted to host such an event. She decided it was a good idea to organize and carry out a “Friends-mas” event mere days before Christmas and somehow thought it was going to make it easier by saying it was going to be “casual.”

Right.

“Casual” turned into us busting out the Christmas china (that we’ve never gotten to use before), which included cups and saucers that were intended to be used for the homemade eggnog that Katie planned to make. We’d have a few simple sides like queso dip with chips and grilled shrimp/cucumber bites, but the main dish would be smoked burnt ends sandwiches with pickled onions. Special china, homemade eggnog, onions I pickled myself and a barbecue dish that required eight hours on the smoker? Real casual, Simpsons.

I chose the burnt ends sandwiches because I’d been wanting to do burnt ends for a long time and thought this was as good a time as any to make it happen. There will be some purists (dare I say gatekeepers) out there who love to jump on their soapbox, pound their chest and sling saliva as they vigorously preach the truth that real burnt ends come from brisket. And they’re right. But your average brisket can weigh 15-18 pounds, which is not only way too much meat for a party of six, but EXPEN$IVE!

Fortunately, Hey Grill Hey has a recipe for Poor Man’s Burnt Ends that uses a three-pound beef chuck roast which alleviates both issues above and works nearly as well as your classic brisket burnt ends. I had to give it a shot!

Not sure how hard our guests would throw down on the barbecue, I got a chuck roast that was nearly five pounds, slathered it in yellow mustard and doused it quite liberally with a spice mixture that was equal parts salt, pepper and garlic powder. This seasoned chunk of sexy then went down on the smoker at 275° F for just a hair under six hours, reaching a temperature of 165° F.

This was an interesting, yet stressful time as I experienced a crippling stall. When cooking slow-and-low, the stall is when your meat’s moisture begins to evaporate, which then cools it. Even though the grill is still pumping hot air, the moisture cooling the meat evens things out and you end up sitting for an uncomfortable amount of time at the same temperature. For me, I hit 150° F in the first two hours of cooking, then slowly crept up to 159° F over the next two hours … then sat at 159° F for a full 90 minutes. I kept my grill temp steady, however, and once the evaporation got its little tantrum over, we were back in action and at 165° F shortly after.

The next step was employing a good old-fashioned “Texas crutch,” which some consider cheating. This is when you wrap your meat in butcher paper and continue to cook. The butcher paper helps prevent heat from escaping and can assist in pushing your meat to higher temperatures in a shorter amount of time. I utilized my Texas crutch for about an hour before we reached the desired temperature of 195° F.

At this point, I let the meat rest for a few minutes before cutting it into bite-sized pieces (and sneaking more than a couple bites). The meat was tender, beautifully smokey, had a decent smoke ring and a very sexy crust. Those cubed meat bits were then dropped into a disposable pan and tossed with some brown sugar and Sweet Baby Ray’s barbecue sauce before being put back on the smoke for yet another 90 minutes.

During my last cook, I got my buns and onions ready. The bread was simply King’s Hawaiian mini-sub rolls that I toasted on the Blackstone with a compound butter made with pressed garlic, olive oil, salt, pepper and fresh basil. Before I started the barbecue, I thinly sliced a red onion and dropped it into a blender bottle and added equal parts water and white vinegar, then added equal parts salt and sugar. I shook this like a Polaroid picture for a minute or so then let it chill in the fridge until dinner time. This, my friends, is called a “quick pickle” and it’s a very easy way to get tasty pickled onions to top your barbecue.

The final product came out great, though maybe not as perfect as I wanted. The barbecue had been given enough time to become super sticky and it was hit with another dose of hickory smoke, the flavor of which really came through in the end. It paired really well with the buttery Hawaiian rolls and the tangy red onions. My only gripe is they were a little tougher than I would have wanted, but at the end of the day, I made burnt ends out of a pot roast so I was still pretty stoked with how they turned out. Our guests were as well.

I must also take a moment to give my wife some props here because that eggnog was OFF THE CHAIN! I must admit I was apprehensive because the concept of homemade eggnog gives me the salmonella creeps, but she did a dynamite job (and used plenty of rum, which was a win in my book)! The consistency was perfect and now I think I’m going to have a hard time drinking the store-bought stuff.

With Friends-mas out of the way, it was time to then focus on Christmas Eve dinner with Pops. He’s undoubtedly the family pitmaster, but I’ve spent four years doing everything in my power to prove my skills to the king. For Christmas dinner, I wanted to do something special but also something I’d never done before: Prime Rib!

I special-ordered a two-bone prime rib from Fresh Market about two weeks before Christmas with the intention of using this Smoked Garlic Butter Prime Rib recipe from Hey Grill Hey. We’d pair it with roasted asparagus, scalloped potatoes, Yorkshire pudding and Katie’s grandmother’s chocolate meringue pie. We couldn’t lose … Unless I messed up the prime rib.

I veered a little from the recipe since most grocery stores were out of thyme two days before Christmas and opted to use fresh oregano since we had some in the fridge. The prime rib was painted with a thick layer of compound butter made with said oregano, pressed garlic, salt, pepper and rosemary. This buttery piece of sexy went down on a rather cool smoker at 225° F for about 3-½ hours. I arranged her on the smoker atop a cooling rack that had been placed over a deep, square cake pan to catch the buttery drippings during the smoke. This would come into play a little later.

Once I hit 120° F, I took it off to cool for about 20 minutes while I stoked the fire in the grill to warm it up to between 400-450° F. During this time, I poured the drippings out of the pan and into a deep skillet, added a dusting of flour and some “good” beef stock and whisked until it came to a boil, then simmered until it was time to serve. This would later be known as garlic-butter au jus and ARE YOU KIDDING ME, y’all this was delicious!

The final step was a quick sear over the open fire until my internal temperature hit 130° F. At this point, my bark was beautifully crispy and it was time to serve. The bones were easily removed and I sliced this beautiful prime rib roast into four equal pieces (about 19oz each) and served with the garlic-butter au jus and some homemade creamy horseradish.

It was the best damn prime rib I’ve ever eaten. I already don’t (usually) order steak out at restaurants because I’m always disappointed and feel I can do better for less money. I now feel that way about prime rib. Cannot. Will not. Order out again.

At the time of this writing, the year has almost reached its conclusion, so I guess there won’t be any new smoker adventures in 2024. What a way to go out, though, no? The 40-year-old smoker enthusiast stereotype holds up and I don’t even care. If you ever get an invite to take part, you’re going to want to show up.

This one will be hard to beat, but I can’t wait to try. See you in 2025.

-JTF