So I want to paint but I haven’t painted anything. I want to write music but I’ve written nothing. I said I was going to start writing more fiction and the like and have created one poem that’s pretty solid and a rough draft for a short story that will probably stay in rough draft mode for the rest of my days. I spent a lot of money on liquid latex and plaster sheets with the sole intention of creating my own masks, yet I’ve done nothing with it and have had the latex since October. I’ve never worked with it before and I’m afraid I’ll screw it up, and while I realize that I’m probably gonna screw it up until I master it and won’t master it until I try it, I still won’t do anything with it because in my down time I’d rather read or watch the Munsters on DVD. We ate Magical Mystery Tour pizza from the Mellow Mushroom for lunch today and although I was fairly confident I’ve had the best pizza in the world there in the past, it’s apparent that I was lying to myself because I had the best today. Pesto, spinach, mushrooms, feta cheese and jalapeno peppers and the Magical Mystery Tour is coming to take you away, now cue the backing vocals. Lots of my NEDC stuff has gone live, but I haven’t posted any links to it yet for my friends because I’m not ready to but you’ll see it all soon, I swear. My church has been awesome and I have a great time there. So much, in fact, that we’re going to be looking into membership and local ministry projects to spread the word that God’s people are good, not snobby Chick-Fil-A eating upper class lipstick layering religious tract close minded right winging morons that currently represent us and what most nonbelievers think of when they hear the word “Christian.” This is why I don’t want to label myself as a Christian, just a child of God. I do most things a Christian would do, but please, don’t call me one. Call me your brother, I’d like that…Also, don’t call me “partner,” “pal” or any variation of, that runs all over me. I’ve been known to be called “Ferocious J” and I think that’s pretty cool although I’m really not ferocious in any way except my art and writing are all ferociously bad. I have a ferociously good looking wife and sometimes have ferociously bad gas during the day due to my whey protein smoothies on Monday, Wednesday and Friday, but other than that, no, nothing ferocious.
I often feel like I’m cutting myself off from a portion of my family but I sometimes wonder if it isn’t them that’s cutting me off. I’ll agree that I don’t and have never really had as much of a relationship with them and although I’ve technically made a minimal effort at doing so, the effort on their part has been even less; Usually zero unless someone is dead, and even that has stopped as of late. At the core, I don’t think I really care, but I’m not entirely sure. I think I’m fooling myself to think there’s a part of me that’s been hurt by it, but truly, I think I’ve become so hardened towards that type of behavior that it simply doesn’t matter to me anymore. Oh well, I think for the next family reunion, Erin and I will be heading to 1313 Mockingbird Lane with Kitty…
Enjoy today’s haiku:
I say I don’t care
And I don’t, yet I do
Concern for caring?