The Weekly Thing, 5/1

I’m going to confess something, dear readers.

My ultimate goal with learning boxing and getting my personal trainer certification is to eventually get to a point where I can teach women’s self defense. This isn’t the confession, of course. Any of you that know me already knew this was the case. Empowering women is a big deal to me and I intend to dedicate a huge portion of my life to it.

Last week I attended my first class at Premier Martial Arts on Hardin Valley Rd. As many of you know, I’ve been looking for a place that offers Muay Thai training and since it’s apparently more difficult to find legit Muay Thai in Knoxville than I anticipated, I decided to broaden my scope to also include Krav Maga — the type of training that would greatly benefit me in my pursuit of women’s self defense leadership. When I called PMA, the woman on the phone explained that after a quick warmup, the classes would be broken down into half Muay Thai, half Krav Maga. It was perfect.

How did it go? Well, let me tell you about the rest of my week and the upcoming week first…


I wrapped up Phase 3, Week 3 of my workout routine as detailed in my post last week. The amount of definition I’m seeing in my body is unlike any I’ve ever seen in my life. I have a not-too-serious goal of adding a lot of definition to my back and lately I’ve been seeing a bit. I’ve also been given compliments on my legs (twice last week) and was referred to as “shredded” during my class at PMA. While getting compliments ins’t the ultimate goal, it’s certainly an added bonus. This is the prettier part of my stronger and prettier mantra.

This week will be my fourth and final week of Phase 3 and will consist of the exact same workout, exact same percentage (85%) but we’re going to 3 sets of 10, up from 3 sets of 8. I’m anxious to get started on Phase 4. I took my measurements on Sunday but don’t have them readily available. I can say that my arms have gotten bigger and my waist has gotten smaller. I’d call it a win.

Side note: Erin is down 10+ inches on the year. If you know her, see her or are friends with her on Facebook, give her a round of applause because she’s working harder than ever to reach her goals and she deserves it. Maybe also take her out for lunch.

Speaking of lunch, meal prep this week includes a pretty awesome chicken dish. Lunch this week is steamed rice with roasted broccoli, zucchini, red onions and cherry tomatoes topped with grilled chicken that I marinated in a ginger-honey sauce (that would later become a glaze) that I got from Tiffani Thiessen. Yes, that Tiffani Thiessen. The Kelly Tiffani Thiessen. Check out the recipe here. Check out my veggies here:

Dinner this week is an old meal prep favorite of mine: Turkey and veggie lasagna from Damn Delicious. This meal is both filling and comforting while also being hella packed full of veggies and lean protein. This lasagna made without changing anything and broken into 10 equal servings comes out to 364 calories, 12 grams of fat, 36 grams of carbs and 31 grams of protein per serving. This leaves plenty of room for a serving of Talenti Caramel Apple Pie gelato for dessert and I ain’t even close to mad.

I also bought a pork belly over the weekend that I intend to cure this week if the postal service will get off their asses and deliver my pink curing salt. With any luck, I’ll have it in the smoker this weekend with sliced bacon ready to rock on Monday. Believe me, there will be a post about it. I even made up a song about it to the tune of the old Crossfire commercial jingle. I won’t be sharing unless you buy me wine and maybe come over for radio show one night.


So PMA…We started the class exactly how the woman said we would. A little bit of running, high knees, butt kickers, etc. We did some crawling on the ground, push-up variations and a few leg stretches. We practiced side-kicks with a partner, which I was actually pretty good at. Next was a simple 1-2-3-roundhouse combination with the pads and a partner, also something I was already pretty good at. My confidence fell from there, though, as we spent nearly half of the 90-minute class on the ground grappling.

I suck at grappling. I know that now. I can knock your lights out on my feet but I’m a fish out of water if you get me on the ground. I scrambled and struggled and fought and tossed and turned until it was all over. “It’s a different world on the ground!” said my partner and now-nemesis.

No shit.

We spent the remainder of class learning how to disarm someone who has pulled a gun on you. I wasn’t great at this, but at least I was on my feet. After disarming your partner, you became the aggressor to be disarmed. A friend told me I had to be pretty good at being the bad guy and she couldn’t be more wrong. In fact, I was worse as a bad guy. I learned that I’d give up my gun pretty easily. I don’t own a gun and have certainly never held someone at gunpoint. Turns out I’m pretty bad at that, too.

I came home after class with bloody toes, scraped knees, burn marks on my shoulders and scrapes on my back. My forearms felt like tree trunks and my chest and back were sore in places I didn’t even know they had. It was a great class and a positive experience, but here’s where the major confession comes in:

I got my ass kicked for an hour.

By a teenager.

Oh, well. No shame. I figure if you get me on the ground, you probably deserve to win. Just watch out for my left hook :-)

On that note, I’m going to leave you with this motivational advice from Good Fucking Design Advice.

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